Saturday, 3 September 2016

two whole years later

It feels very strange typing a post to publish on my blog considering it has been over two whole years since I last published a post on here.

Why did I stop blogging? I'm honestly not too sure as there was not one specific reason, however I also didn't actually plan to stop blogging. In the last few months of published posts back in 2014 I just slowly started posting less and less, which can be attributed to the fact this was nearing my GCSE's. When I finished them, despite having the long summer ahead, I just never sat down and came back to blogging and it spiralled from there. I do still read blogs (but not hardly as much as I used to...) but the passion I had for it seemed to disappear and I didn't have any motivation to blog.

I feel strangely connected yet very distant from blogging, as despite not being 'active' on my blogs twitter I still go on it multiple times a day so I still feel like I'm immersed within the blogging world, without actually being a part of it. I have actually considered re-starting blogging a few times since I last posted but I have been very busy the past two years and never got round to it...I still as I write this don't honestly feel like the passion I once had for it has suddenly come back, BUT something made me open my laptop and write this post which I'm not sure where its going!

I think the most important and strange thing for me sitting here and writing this as I am a completely different person to who I was the last time I pressed 'publish' on a post. In June 2014 which is when my last post is dated, I was a quite very awkward 16 year old (which is still evident in my side bar and about me page..should prob change that) who had just finished GCSE's who lacked a lot of confidence generally. Fast forward to now and I'm 18 years old, just completed a-levels at sixth form, going to university and passed my driving test (the latter three all which  happened in the last three months). Aside from these 'milestones' the most drastic difference which I see in myself everyday is personal growth.

Personal growth is something I think is so important, and honestly I'm not sure how I managed to become the person I am today compared to two years ago. That sounds like I've had some life changing experiences or something which isn't true - its not quite that dramatic. However I do know my general confidence and self confidence has grown so much but this has not been without very very down points too. I have experienced quite a roller coaster the last two years and am I exactly at the place I want to be right now? No I'm not, but that's the best thing about your own personal growth and development, its a journey.

On that note, I have a lot of topics like the aforementioned one which I'd like to write about on here as I do think the last two years (particularly the last year) have been the most eventful of my entire life. When I contemplated writing about this I realised maybe a reason I fell out of love with my blog was feeling restricted to 'beauty' and I feel like now I just couldn't write purely about that, i have been exposed to so many new things I would like to share to that it would seem silly to only write about one topic when there are things I would really like to write about.

So who knows, despite starting University at the end of this month maybe coming back to blogging isn't a realistic task, but I think having the freedom to just right down my thoughts makes it much more appealing than slaving away over a product review (not saying I'm not going to stop these). Maybe I'll have a blog re design so it doesn't feel so cutesy and come back to posting more regularly on both here and my social media accounts!

But for now, I feel like the time is right to slowly return to blogging... (this was very long and ramble-y typed at 00:10 so if you've read this far, thank you Haha)


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